One Day I Will Know

My idea of true love is simple, I’m sitting in the passenger seat of a beater old car, and the 90 degree weather sun is shining bright! All the windows are rolled down and the winds blowin’ through my hair. The radio is blasting and I am belting the music, singing as loud and proud as I can (trust me that isn’t pretty) I look to my left and he is just smiling, completely happy and content being with me and my bad singing. Me (no makeup on, wearing shorts and a t-shirt) not feeling a bit self-conscious or stupid just being myself with someone who I know is being their complete selves with me. The next question that may enter your mind is where are we driving?? Well isn’t that the fun of this whole picture! Who knows?! I’m sure me and my true love will discover that one-day but as for know me and all you other curious readers will just have to wait a bit.

Wink Wink Nod Nod

A little birdie once told me, “you should write one about me.” Yes, you know who you are…. blonde, blue eyes, skinny, and drop dead gorgeous! It seems like only a short time ago I was holding one of the tiniest little, cutest babies I had ever seen in my life thinking to myself, “could she be anymore adorable??” I can remember going over to “the hidden house” with good old Chance for a weekend night babysitting job. Playing house, Movie Theater, Barbies, poly pockets, and dress ups. Through years of Christmas breaks, babysitting, cousin’s camp, and Sunday dinners together we built lasting, unforgettable memories. I always got sooo ecstatic when I discovered you were coming over for Sunday dinner, which would result in building full blown houses in the play room complete with personalized bedrooms! Through all of these years, I think back on all of the meaningful, fun memories, one sticks out the most.
It was a sunny, bright day in Seattle, WA. Spending the day in downtown Seattle had always been my favorite, we had just finished lunch at a fish n’ chips restaurant along the pier and thought it a good time to finish off the day with ice cream. Sitting at the picnic tables, each of us rivaling the sun with our neon camp shirts, we began to laugh uncontrollably. With such a large group we took up quite a few tables but somehow we ended up with our own. We began goofing off, making up a cool handshake to beat out the rest! (and can I just say…WE DID!) While I don’t remember our handshake, I don’t remember the year, and I don’t remember our conversation, I remember thinking how gorgeous, fun loving, and happy you are. Sure times change, we all start growing up but certain memories and relationships will never fade. As I have said before love is a powerful word. Know that I love you. I have grown up with you since your birth, I have been there from the beginning and I know you are going to be an amazing woman someday! There is one extremely lucky man for you in the future, who better live his life as near to perfect as he can to deserve such a girl as you. If I could give you one piece of advice for the up coming years in your life it would be this, be you. Love who you are and rock it! Never be afraid to stand-alone for what is right because in truth you never will be alone. I am always just a phone call away. You are loved and always will be.
One of my top 3 all time favorite quotes goes like this, "Laugh as much as you breathe and love as longs as you live." Live: step by step, enjoy each moment in life….babysteps. Laugh: until you get a 6 pack…I once read 100 laughs a day pushes death far away! Love: You are loved by family, friends, and me. Show love freely and willingly. Yes my dearest, favoritest cousin (wink wink nod nod) Live. Laugh. Love.  Remember dear readers, Love who you are, Live who you are, and ROCK IT! 

blingin rings, surprise kisses, and love for mothers

My favorite part of a wedding is when the father gets to share one last dance with his daughter before passing her off to her new husband. I always get so choked up watching the father look tenderly at his daughter, obviously reminiscing upon her growing up in his head. Then the excited new husband gets to sweep her off her feet to finish off the dance. I have always coveted the happiness you can see in newly weds eyes. Each of them knowing that they are official each other’s, no one else’s. Happy in the comfort of knowing the other loves them without a doubt. Love is powerful. Yes, I will openly admit to being a romantic. Romance novels, romantic comedies, and love poems always make me swoon. For me it is the unexpected affectionate touch, the unforeseen kiss, or the random wink that mean the most. The unplanned and unexpected show you they truly care for you. One of my all time favorite quotes on love is, “Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her.’” To me true love is being atypical, spontaneous, and even a little crazy at times. While I feel nowhere near ready for marriage and have no plans of getting married in the next few years, I still look forward to the new happy times of married life. Remember to show love to those you care about, you never know when they may be gone. I think its funny how we never know we care about someone so much until they are gone. Lets break that trend, remember, “Yesterday is History, Tomorrow a Mystery, Today is a Gift, that’s why it's called the Present” Today is Mothers Day, Happy Mother’s Day to all you wonderful mothers, but especially mine!

I love you mom, I always have and I always will. Remember dear readers: there is no love in this world unless we show it. Happy Mothers Day! 

Sincerely, The New Me.

I don’t open up to people. The truth is I rarely tell people my deepest desires, lowest times, or stories of many tearful nights. I have assumed the role of listener, I feel like I am a good listener, while I always can’t always relate I can always provide a shoulder to lean on or sincere advise. While my past has held many sleepless nights, shattered dreams, and streaming tears I cannot complain. Recently I have been thinking back through my life, while I am only 19 years old, I was surprised how much there was to look back on. I came to a sad realization. I have been going through life on my own. I avoid help, kindness, and advise from those whom are willing and wanting to help me through my life’s journey. I am determined to work on being more personable and open up to others. To kick off this new life of “open book” I want to share some of my dreams with you (bare with me I’m a helpless romantic). I want to fall desperately, head over heels, sleeplessly in love with someone who thinks they love me 10X more than I love them, someone who will be fine with being dirt poor just as long as they know we have each other’s love to carry us through to the next day. I want a dog, heaven help me if I fall deeply in love with a man who is a dog hater…oh wait I wont, I could never get over that! I want a house with flowers in my garden, I love flowers; flowers bring me untold happiness (especially tulips future husband!) I want to run the Boston marathon, yes; I am reaching for the stars! I want children, to love something more than your own life has always sounded appealing to me! As I am listing just a few of my many dreams for this lifetime I am smiling. Have you smiled today? Enjoy your life, let others in, life is a journey not a ride, remember, sometimes we have to hike up mountains to get to the pretty views.